The Bridge On The River Kwai

Don’t ever say that the Bunn doesn’t like movies. I just finished watching this one for the umpteenth time.

I couldn’t help but imagine myself (if I were a monkey), as William Holden, making a desperate attempt to stop JR, played by Alec Guinness, from doing the wrong thing, but then he inadvertently does the right thing anyway… so at least it was suggested that I had fun with Siamese girls along the way. There are worse ways to check out, cinematically speaking.

I always thought of William Holden as the anti-intellectual forbearer of Bruce Willis. Ha ha… just kidding about the forbearer of part. To think seriously about this, and therefore I shan’t, would prevent me from experiencing the now!

Am I stupider enough for you yet?

23 Replies to “The Bridge On The River Kwai”

  1. Here’s to William Holden.

    He was also in the Bridges at Toko Ri. He goes down in a hail of bullets with a loyal and courageous Mickey Rooney. Damn.

  2. Holden died in a drunken stupor, after falling (backwards, as I recall) and hitting his head on the edge of a glass coffee table. Take home lesson: get rid of those glass coffee tables, they’re dangerous.

    May his inner demons rest in peace.

  3. Whoa, kinda quiet around here. Youu Whoo! Anybody home? JR, you should lock the front door. In these hard economic times, people might come in and steal the furniture, those fine photographs, or the laptops. I guess they could squat for awhile. Nobody’s using all this space, anyway.

    Any food in the reefer?

  4. The funniest thing I’ve read all day (deserves to be a full-on proper post but I’m on vacation, so this will have to do):

    To be clear, “Resident Evil 5” is not a game about killing Africans. Your job, as a player, is to save villages that have been victimized by a biochemical terrorist group. The first fearsome opponent you face is a blonde-haired female and you are rescued several times by another troupe of African soldiers. And ultimately, the game suggests that the barbarism depicted in the game is a result of your enemies’ zombieness, not their African identity. In short, Africans don’t beat you to death with their hands — zombies do.

    But at times, the zombies hardly seem zombie-like when they control machine gun turrets and steer watercraft. Aside from when their faces open up and turn into tentacles, the zombies look like everyday African people, albeit ones that are trying to kill you. That’s the point — zombies are almost people.

  5. All right… since JR doesn’t want to show up to play JR, allow me to stand in…

    Fuck all ofyou. this time I I’m not talking about half assing it. Now we start a pirate blog by the name of Reefer Brownies for America. It rhymes with Nudge’s blog, so let her sue us. It will be a war of attrition and an act of contrition simultaneously.

    Has it ever occured to any of you that anti-tank weapons built in America are just as proportionately absurdly expensive as state of the art tanks? Nevertheless, we require superiority in the air. Otherwise the motherfucking Kim Jung Il and his ilk will think they have a window of opportunity. Those chink bastards think they’re going to get free i-pods and be able to adopt white children once the accounts are settled… well, well, well, I know that you know that they’ve got another thing coming.

    Back later…

  6. Bailout On The River Derivatives. Obama in the Guinness role. Wall Street/Bankers as the Japs. Tax Dollars as the Bridge. Continued rampant consumerism, easy credit and bubble-level real estate prices awaits on the other side.

    Or something.

  7. Thank god you’re here, Donovan! At last, cogent reinforcements. I must dumb myself down further with liquor and TiVo’d basketball, before going on a rampage of research to determine what life lessons might be learned from multi-axially analyzing the laminar flow of William Holden’s head against the glass coffee table edge, as a function of BAC naturally.

  8. It may well be that the aforementioned dumbing down process may provide you with realtime data (and attendant life lessons) regarding cranium v. coffee table. Assuming of course that the act of acquiring of said data does not subsequently render it inaccessible.

  9. AU, by tomorrow, I’ll have new erect herb futures data in my spread sheet, just as soon as I can extract and sanitize my digital voice recorder. This may well require special tongs. Hold still, Mimi.

  10. Are you fucking crazy? Haven’t you been paying any attention? I never touch the stuff. It’s all part of deep cover. Like the way Michael Anthony used to to chug an entire bottle of brown liquid that was supposed to be Jack Daniels during the middle of a VH show back in the 70’s. I only know of such things from when I travel time. Errr… nevermind that doesn’t mesh with omniscience. Never mind never mind. It most certainly does!

  11. American Idol?!? Jesus Christ, Doom. You really are the greatest nihilist of us all. JR was right from the start.

    I am a fraud.

    JR is also right about dave teaching the rest of us how to blog better. I mean the lessons go right in one floppy ear and out the other, but in theory they could stick.

    You and dave have been blogging for about 10 years it sounds like. I only started this crap two years ago. Are there actually people who lurk for years and never post? The first new person who posts here tonight (lame-ass sockpuppets are ineligible) wins naked pictures of Dale’s wife — copulating with Anton Zandor LeVey, on the back of an elephant they were, back in the day.

    Fuck you. And you too.

    How green was your fucking valley, Mr. Douche.

    Pass the goddamn elephant grade peanuts and shut the fuck up.

  12. Today we had three (3) trees removed from our backyard, a kukui nut, autograph, and Formosan Koa. Only the kukui nut was a ‘store-bought’ tree, the other two being volunteers. The reason was more light for the garden. Also, moron freed soil space, as those three trees all had amazingly aggressive root systems. There was discussion of saving a boundary wall.

    This was done after some thought. Those trees provided shade and cooler spots in our hot summers, and sun protection for skin-cancer prone haoles, like moi. There was also some wind protection or mitigation. And, tree surgeons are not cheap in these parts.

    Hey, it got me out of a tree house project: no big tree, no tree house, sorry, kid. Bonus was free mulch for the garden.

  13. Yes, American Idol. I endear myself to the rest of the family by pointing out that their incessant jabber during the songs suggests to moi that they are both tone deaf and uncaring about the music they claim to be so excited about.

    OK, back in the trash can, Oscar.

  14. Bridge over troubled Idol…

    If you call me Betty…


    You god! I am increasingly wowed by your virtuoso impressions of JR. I can feel what little of my mental health that remains, slipping away.

  15. “Veterans Affairs Secretary Eric Shinseki confirmed Tuesday that the Obama administration is considering a controversial plan to make veterans pay for treatment of service-related injuries with private insurance.”

    This is the kind of spineless shit you might expect from the Bush Administration, not from Mr. Change.

    Two words Mr. President – FUCK YOU – for allowing one of your fuck drones to even think of this, much less verbalize it or put it to paper or pixel.

    When the social welfare entitlements and the bailout of the bank criminals take precedence over medical care to veterans for conditions directly related to military service, regardless of whether you fucking agree with what the government orders the military to do, you stoop to a low that, frankly, you may never recover from.

    Do you not recall how this country the Vietnam Vets? How the fuck is this different? You shameless fucking cretins.

    Posted by: Howard Effing Beale | March 12, 2009 at 03:52 PM

    Do you not recall how this country TREATED the Vietnam Vets?

    Posted by: Howard Effing Beale | March 12, 2009 at 03:59 PM

  16. EE your right, BB is doing JR impressions. Pretty good but JR has a very distinct style, including the way he destroys the drum kit upon completing the solo. Bunn totally has Holmes number though. Jules Varden can do thal. I’m no good at anybody. However, I’ve mentioned before that I have adopted a number of davisms when reviewing documents at work, just to liven things up, and that seems to work pretty well.

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