Nudged

Nudge requests ZK support for mid-summer offensive

Nudge requests ZK take the lead in late-summer offensive.

Nudge, the prolific extrapolator of the modern human trajectory, is unplugging her keyboard and embarking on a hiatus from blogdom, whereupon she will pursue an assortment of worldly passions.  Salute!

http://futuretowniesofamerica.wordpress.com/

This entry was posted by Bif.

17 thoughts on “Nudged

  1. “Have any of you fellas seen a tall Germanic anti-industrial sort of guy preaching a symbolic language-style yet utilitarian sermon in these parts? What I mean is genuine unplugged handyman exploits.”

    “How tall, lady?”

    “See how tall I am? Taller.”

  2. “See that wall behind me?
    That’s where we’re going to shoot the fool who doubled up on the ‘8’ sign.”

  3. Pip-pip, toot-toot, jolly good old chaps, let’s go give Jerry some stick, eh what!

  4. Nudge: “After the war is over, we’ll all live in bright cities powered from far away power plants and commute from sprawling suburbs over vast interstate highway systems. Everyone will be happily entertained by the glow of televised shows in their living rooms and will be communicating with friends and family over widespread telephone lines and even wireless radio.”

    Boys: Wow!

    Nudge: “Yes, and even Dick Tracey’s wrist communcator will become a realty. It will cause problems, however, when communters attempt to use them whilst driving their automobiles. Like some men have problems driving with women along the roadside today.”

    Boys: Ohhh….

  5. Nurse Nudge: You all have the Clap.

    ZK Boys: What! That’s not possible.

    Nurse Nudge: Well your tests all came back positive.

    ZK Boys: Not possible, a bunch of us got promoted to corporals just last week.

    Nurse Nudge: Uh, and…?

    ZK Boys: We heard the clap only affects privates!

  6. “It’s been about a year now since JR and others talked me into moving beyond CFN. You know who you are. JR was kind enough to first host my posts on Zulu Kilo, then let me put my own stuff there .. and in return I still go back sometimes to clean out the spam trap. Those other posts should get listed someday in the ToC page on FTA, but that’s a task that can wait. I’d still love to meet JR in person .. just not in this icky hot weather.”

    I hate this weather. It won’t even have the balls to hit 90 like in the last few years. Global warming is a scam. This is much worse. It rained for 2 straight months in Boston. But then it stopped and turned into this shit. I swear I could write a book about the weather around these parts.

    Just ask AU.

    Buy “Cheap.” Or read it at a bookstore or from a library. Chapter ? (the start) on discounts. The first paragraph is about the weather in Boston.

    Nudge… Nudge…. I don’t know what to say. You should have said yes on that Friday or Saturday.

    Massa should have been driving slower.

    I keep thinking my worst mistake was when I … nevermind. It was.

    I was wondering who was cleaning out the spam. I do it once every three or four days, but it always seems there is less than there should be.

    I would call you right now, but it is almost 2. Plus there is a problem with my phone. Apparently T-Mobile is under the impression that I owe them money. I was under the impression that I’ve been a loyal customer for over 7 years and they send me offers for free phones every month. How about a free month? Do you think you could toss me that?

    Like I say: Buy “Cheap.” $26.95 (minus %30 with my Borders membership which costs nothing) + (minus the $11.37 left on my Borders gift card I got 3 years ago) = $7.

    Hint: Right before Christmas tell family members you are anti-consumerist and spend most of your time READING about baby seals and how to save the environment. Borders sells books, CDs, DVDs, magazines, coffee, food (chocalate and cheesecake). So Borders giftcards are basically cash.

    Plus – smart, bored women frequent Borders… Lemme write this part tomorrow, cuz I want to include a section for the ladies and …

    anyway, Borders giftcards are as close to cash as you are going to get for Christmas.

    I don’t care if it is $20. If you give me a Borders giftcard. You are going to heaven.

    Sincerely,
    The Pope

  7. As an addendum –

    If I ran Borders, I would start installing gas pumps, NG refuelling stations, and Full electric-vehicle recharge stations.

    AND BRAGGING ABOUT IT!

    Hellloooo?

  8. Thank God for Dave. Without his gang bang comment, I wouldn’t have known what was going on.

    OK. Works for me. I’m back. Good to go.

    Nudge’s problem is she writes too much. A pace like that will burn you out. Or kill most people. Better to have a crystal meth habit.

    Trust me. I hate my own style (which has always sucked, nobody needs to confirm that) and try every second to emulate Dave.

    Dave’s problem is he can’t get anybody to like his style (except me). For me, the key is just to say what you are going to say. Say what you mean and then STFU.

    You are blogging, not writing. Right? This is why I love Dave. It is not only possible to understand him (aside from when he is intentionally being cryptic or when he is expounding on those god-awful French movies he loves so much) – it is possible to do it within the timeframe of a 24-second attention span.

    I’ve been reading Dave for quite a long time (3 years?). I’m pretty sure I’m an expert (on Dave). He knows what he is doing.

    @Dave – don’t let this go to your head. I’ve only offered you an editorship like 17 times. Each time I was drunk. Sometimes I was high. Like the complete gentleman you are, you never once even considered accepting.

    So now you are fucked. Because Cambridge cops have made it illegal to write, and Obama has made it illegal to be a Cambridge cop.

    See you on the flipside.

    P.S. – I would give half of my left nut to see you return to CFN. It’s a new blog service, so if you were banned, it’s a clean slate. And you have my word – I wouldn’t say shit in support of you (there). Here I would praise you hourly

  9. This is brutal. I’m having another nervous breakdown. Luckily it involves 3 women vying for my attention.

    There are no corporals or privates in my army.

    Bunn – You are now a Brigadier General.

    Reportedly Sherman was mental and Grant was a full-blown alcoholic. I’d feel better if whatisname wasn’r a complete womanizer.

    Can’t an man be known for reading books? WTF?

    I have a 12-inch cock. I only get drunk 5 nights a week, and I’m only a little bit crazy. I don’t want to be a Civil War General, I just want to command a battalion and matbe be president later.

    Just someone set out the standards I need to live by.

    I swear on the Bible, I haven’t snorted coke in over 20 years. I would love to, but I haven”t. That’s strenghth.

  10. 17 years. I’m telling the truth. I was just trying to narrow it down. But we need to get off this subject. It’s making me thing about stuff.

  11. i sincerely hope that dave will post his cows moving around the barn video clips again. i miss the excitement, the action. it’s kinda dead around here now.

  12. Doom –

    missing you over at the Clusterfuck. Are you pulling a Nudge/ Dave /MOU /Bif /Tipping / Holmes /Mary /Yarra /EE / Remus/AU deal ? (if I forgot someone-smack me)

    YES! Yes, I’ll say it. It actually really bothers me that my favorite guys and gals don’t post over there anymore but post here and on FutureTownies.

    I don’t need backup. OEO and I can handle any contingency. Actually OEO can handle himself. I occassionally back him up. (yes, I know you all hate him)

    But you guys were the best thing that ever happened to that blog.

    If you don’t return (@Doom), I’ll be the last one standing and I’ll spend my life trying to make sure dale doesn’t get popular.

    I’m human. I need help.

    Please. At least read once in a while.

    Please. I’m begging you. I’ll do what you want.

    Doom, if you take on dale, I’ll fuck him up.

    And I promise 2 things.

    1) I’m working on oil.

    2) I’ll take Nudge to dinner. It’s hard. She is sooo picky. Me, I don’t eat. But she has to have the best sushi and insists not only on correct temperature, but humidity levels… me? i don’t have any issues… well … I believe all baby seals and penguins should be tortured before they are beaten to death,

    And we shouldn’t even consider eating them. They are scum and should be burned. The fires will advance the cause of Global Warming.

    If you don’t support Palin in any form, you are a dickhead.

  13. It’s no true amigo, I don not hate OEO/zsazsa/aszasz/zzzzz. Sometimes he really pisses me off, but he moron than makes up for that behavior lapse by sticking it to all the CFN morons and fucktards, and they are legion, on a regular basis. And, he somehow manages to live in Cleveland.

    Oh OK, if you want me to, I’ll mosey over there, but I’ll just end up getting into a fight with dick-head dale, or asoka the producers.

    If you see me at CFN, you’ll know I’m only there because you asked for me to be there. This will of course cost you plenty.

    I love the irony of those you love to see posting there, posting over here on YOUR blog, instead. So thick you can cut it with a knife.

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